From the Office of Readings for today, the Second Reading
for the Feast of the Conversion of St. Paul, is just too good not to share with
a broader readership.
From a homily by Saint John Chrysostom, bishop, For love of Christ, Paul bore every burden
Paul, more than anyone else, has shown us what man really is, and in
what our nobility consists, and of what virtue this particular animal is
capable. Each day he aimed ever higher; each day he rose up with greater ardour
and faced with new eagerness the dangers that threatened him. He summed up his
attitude in the words: I forget what is behind me and push on to what lies
ahead. When he saw death imminent, he bade others share his joy: Rejoice and be
glad with me! And when danger, injustice and abuse threatened, he said: I am
content with weakness, mistreatment and persecution. These he called the
weapons of righteousness, thus telling us that he derived immense profit from
them.
Thus, amid the traps set for
him by his enemies, with exultant heart he turned their every attack into a
victory for himself; constantly beaten, abused and cursed, he boasted of it as
though he were celebrating a triumphal procession and taking trophies home, and
offered thanks to God for it all: Thanks be to God who is always victorious in
us! This is why he was far more eager for the shameful abuse that his zeal in
preaching brought upon him than we are for the most pleasing honours, more
eager for death than we are for life, for poverty than we are for wealth; he
yearned for toil far more than others yearn for rest after toil. The one thing
he feared, indeed dreaded, was to offend God; nothing else could sway him.
Therefore, the only thing he really wanted was always to please God.
The most important thing of all
to him, however, was that he knew himself to be loved by Christ. Enjoying this
love, he considered himself happier than anyone else; were he without it, it
would be no satisfaction to be the friend of principalities and powers. He
preferred to be thus loved and be the least of all, or even to be among the
damned, than to be without that love and be among the great and honoured.
To be separated from that love
was, in his eyes, the greatest and most extraordinary of torments; the pain of
that loss would alone have been hell, and endless, unbearable torture.
So too, in being loved by
Christ he thought of himself as possessing life, the world, the angels, present
and future, the kingdom, the promise and countless blessings. Apart from that
love nothing saddened or delighted him; for nothing earthly did he regard as
bitter or sweet.
Paul set no store by the things
that fill our visible world, any more than a man sets value on the withered
grass of the field. As for tyrannical rulers or the people enraged against him,
he paid them no more heed than gnats. Death itself and pain and whatever
torments might come were but child’s play to him, provided that thereby he
might bear some burden for the sake of Christ.
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